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when the government blew up the beirut port and killed 218 people, injured 6,500 people, and displaced 300,000, a dog that accompanied the chilean rescue team detected one heartbeat beneath the rubble. from near and far, we all waited for news of this one heartbeat beneath the rubble, and for a time, hope lived there. when i woke up the next morning, 19 bpm was down to 7 and then. and then. // sharing this draft from aug 4, 2020 bc i don’t know what to do. and bc crisis is everywhere. and bc lebanon and elsewhere is not just the failed state but it is evidence that the state does not work, and certainly not so in a context of imperialism. forget political entities, conclusions, certainties. enso. the one certainty: this is not working. // i don’t like to be vulnerable or to share rough drafts but something somewhere needs to give. let’s put pressure on it. // i also don’t feel entitled to or comfortable with the “we”, as a leb person born in diaspora, but it’s here. i also believe we can learn from each other. not to see beirut or lebanon as the most superlative of superlatives (as many lebanese do; that is a big distortion and a narcissistic lie) but to learn across paradigms. // felt urgent will archive later detroit dearborn beloveds come 2 open mic brunch with mana2eesh and mimosas at spot lite detroit on july 24 bring the sun and ur poems with u // link in bio thing detroit come future with us // july 26 // link in that list thing in my bio // in person @room_project_ with @visionsoftransition // (and always, co-creator/conspirator @lalalaleilala in spirit) fundraiser for gaza relief this friday 🍉 it’s free palestine every day til palestine is free 🍉 ✌🏽❤️🇵🇸 this is the word. pass it on. free falasteen. down with police states everywhere. // ty @cheriendabis for 1st pic, @salimahfm for 2nd pic, and 3rd is my window. the B in BDS / brands to boycott to support life and dismantle apartheid / free palestine ✌🏽🇵🇸 / n boycott america yalla let’s tax strike hmu (via @bdsnationalcommittee website) / BDS is banned in NYC FYI “i am anything i am everything” by palestinian artist ayman yossri daydban. he hand folded a stainless steel sheet and any other found material into a palestinian flag. 🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸palestine forever. anywhere. everywhere. especially in palestine. 🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸@daydban ❤️✌🏼 cross the border of mediums to demolish the border between mediums // sometimes a handwritten letter and an envelope of art from a friend (@anonymouslyner) will remind you of yourself, and sometimes thinking of a friend (@iammarstian) or a sister (@yo__manda) will give you confidence, and sometimes the tools of an elder (@eteladnandaily) will help you exist easier. sometimes this will all be facilitated by a friend (@j7md) once gifting you something that’s since been in a corner collecting dust. it all takes a village. it is important to know how people define and redefine and undefine love. // more nawal in eflux. // ending with the first pages i ever read of hers. over a decade ago, upstairs in the college library stacks, i sat on the floor, stunned with the possibility that truth could be told. that the dominating narratives of patriarchy could be challenged. // not pictured: the passage from woman at point zero with the character named camelia, one of the few and earliest times in which i felt seen in the english language. albeit through translation and a narrative very different from my own, the feeling still happened. // many will find this familiar, that men, even among her contemporaries, dismissed her by saying she exaggerated. // exaggerate, people, as far as your imagination will take you.